Mooch and Earl Sunflower Style

what's a girl to do?

Everything is coming together slowly, but amazingly. I am starting to feel better and i owe it all to God, who has never left me even though i thought at some point he had.
I should start work pretty soon and i can't wait for that day.
Daniel has left again but i cannot think of it constantly because that would only hurt me.
Even though he said he wouldn't leave, it didn't last. He pretty much only talks to me when he wants.
In part, i don't blame him because work tends to suck our lives but the other half of him, the half that allows it to happen, i do blame. I don't want to carry the weight of not knowing nor am i going to let myself worry. It is not in my hands anymore so i gave that worry to God. I'm sure he'll have a better handle on it because i cannot do it.

I don't know how to handle it within myself, the person. I've exhausted all the words for him and there is nothing new to say.
What's a girl to do?
I miss him terribly when he's gone but he doesn't talk to me much when i need him.
I trust that God will reach out to him and illuminate him.
For now, i can only hope.

He just told me he felt lonely and that i should be there. I am not lonely now but i have been and sometimes i do need him to wrap his arm across my chest. He doesn't have to be lonely. He could always be here...with me.

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posted on 2009-10-25 @ 10:59 p.m.