Mooch and Earl Sunflower Style

i need support.

sometimes i really wish i had more support, like someone who is truly on our side. i don't tell fabi this because i know it would pile on more pressure. things are challenging enough as it is. sure, none of my family know him yet but that's just IT. you don't know him so why have these concerns and thinly veiled comments arise where it feels like you are being supportive but in reality you sound like you doubt or think something could go wrong.
why do some christians insist we should be guided by faith and not doubt yet things change when its you or someone you love in question? why can't you just accept that yes... this relationship is hard but have faith in it against all odds. that just because he isn't at a 'level' of christianity that it means a life/marriage with him is off the table? you should have more faith that God has a purpose in our union and that if this is happening, God HAS a plan.
It's not like Fabi is saying he does not want to live a life surrendered to God so please, have some damn patience. He is barely in the door to the U.S. and he knows what to expect with my family when he sets foot here. i know you want the best for me. you are my family but can you please trust me for once? trust my choice. we are both in love and i know i WILL marry him. i will never love anyone else as long as i live.

i will not let your skepticism ruin these few short months of preparation and planning. this trip is getting closer and there's nothing I'd love more than everyone pitching in to make him feel loved, accepted and in christ show him the love some of his family didn't. i want him to feel welcome and i want him to feel God's love through all of you. He knows the best life is lived in christ and i know he is willing.

i'm overwhelmed in hearing "you need to tell him this, kenet"
"does he know?"

i know it all. it has been drilled in me since day one. trust me, i know.

i don't want to end up being one of those people who is basicallly forced into choosing between her family's approval and her true love.
i don't want to be put in that position. ever. i waited for the right one for 25 years. i sacrificed so much, got my heart broken to be put into another shattering dilemma.

I'm not letting others dictate my decisions any more.
I'm going to be happy and no one is going to take that away from me.

prev / next

posted on 2014-09-18 @ 9:56 p.m.