I made myself forget all pride months prior presenting myself as the mature one ready and willing to forget all bumps and bruises and continue on with this friendship at least. If you hadn't noticed this about me, I'm TERRIBLE at letting go of people. When someone i care about is gone, i cry and i don't get over it as easily and yeah... call me weak, fine... but i actually treasure my friends and find that some are irreplaceable in spite of their douche-bag actions

Of course, he fed me explanations and i listened to them because at that point what else did i have to lose by listening?
You could feel how awkward HE felt just trying to push this back into a normal guy/girl friendship as if nothing bad had ever happened but oiii....i knew and he knew something had been ripped apart without the possibility of mending. He left and didn't talk to me for 9 months. Yup, i questioned it but decided some time after that it wasn't worth the headache or time and i really did move on and before i knew it, i had kinda forgotten about him all together.
Then he resurfaces like a bad pimple and i'm thinking "Oh, Shit..."
I told him straight up that i didn't think i'd ever hear from him again and as a way of trying to make things better he presented himself as a monster but you know how that usually works out. When you are finally okay and have found some sort of peace of mind, shit gets real REALLY QUICK.
I didn't mention my boyfriend at first. I didn't think i needed to because things felt and had gotten so cold between us that it just occurred to me that i wouldn't NEED to mention him. Nick and i did a thing during the months i was alone and Daniel wasn't in my life. He actually had a pretty explosive temper but never to me. He always presented himself like the sweetest person when it came to me. I was that calm he needed and he was the raging storm in a sense.
He attempted to flirt with me the other night and i stopped him dead in his tracks and finally just told him i was in a serious relationship. After telling him that, i just got to thinking 'How dare anyone [in general] expect to just pick things up after practically a year of absence?' and not just that... THE CIRCUMSTANCES of said absence. Jeeeesus. Things don't work that way but people reallt seem to think so. It's laughable.
He stopped talking to me because he had met someone. I had no idea about any of it but i [should of] assumed that was the case. I Reeeeeeeally should of.... and now, the woman he stopped talking to ME for turned out to be a whack job psycho and he is not with her anymore. He told me he regretted doing this... leaving me when i was actually the one who made him happy.

Umm. Right.

Too bad. Too late. Oh well.
I found it funny but only because people just don't GET that chances don't hang around waiting for you to take them. They dissolve and float away towards smarter people. I had texted him several times letting him know we could talk and give things another go but he ignored me instead of just telling me what the hell was going on like he should of in the first place and wouldn't text back, so guess what? I MOVED ON. that's what happens. People have to keep moving forward. Doi.
I wouldn't have judged him if he had just told me the fucking truth and y'know... for the life of me i just don't understand how men think its okay to run away and omit the truth. I don't get why they can't just be honest to another person. If he would of told me about it, i wouldn't of had to spend all that time wondering why things turned out that way. I told my boyfriend all about him and the fact that he had reached out to me again.

If you make a choice, deal with it.
Nick is a pretty decent guy but he messed up. Yes, he regrets it but i can't do anything about that. I hope he can find someone who brings out the best in him. I tried to fix things when they were fixable but it's too late for that.

You put all your trust in people and they let you down. If there is anyone who never deserved all the shit that was given to her, that's me. People have hurt me and crushed my heart but i am glad that i am finally with someone who i know will make me happy.
He's the best thing that's ever happened to me and if people like Nick thought at the time that hurting me was more important and justifiable, then cool. Deal with the consequences of your actions.

I knew sooner or later regret would find it's host, and i finally feel validated.

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