YEARS. That doesn't just go away, but i know it will eventually...someday.

When i think about it, i know that if i ever went back to you, i'd still crawl into the hole i was in. I'd still feel uncertain that you'd love me -not sure if you ever did- maybe you cared about me a great deal, but in the end, i don't think you'd give as much as you took.

Maybe i'm just sad over you not ever showing me love the way i wanted. The 'what could of been but never was' kind of deal. Something -however small- still tugs away at a heart string or two. And anyway, do you ever completely get over someone that meant so much to you like that 100%?

That's what i'm trying to find out. I guess it's okay to still feel a little bout of sadness about something that meant a lot. That was eight years that just blew away with nothing to show for it.

Well actually, i'm hoping Friend for Life. At least i hope i have that.
In reality you never get over it when something important never panned out. There will always be that disappointment but at least i know now that i can achieve closure at some point. I'm very happy with my boyfriend and he understands -because i've told him- how much you meant to me and how long everything went between us.

The most disappointing part was never being able to have you SEE the look in my eyes when i was in love. Maybe if you saw just how everything about you made me feel... -but no.

Things happen for a reason, even if i never fully figure out what that reason was.

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