I'm still working hard towards my final weight loss goal. Out of everyone who took on this challenge, i'm the only with any real will power. Sure, i want a Whataburger but i set aside cheat days for the weekend when it really counts and even then, it's not a real cheat day. I still manage my portions... only i do enjoy the food i am eating. Harding was right when he said you could still enjoy good food in moderate amounts... only in our culture... we exaggerate on the portions, eat until we're stuffed and eat more than three times a day (at least, in Mexico where everything is tempting). I've never starved in the three months i've been doing this. That doesn't work.

I feel better, i just have to own and embrace the parts of my body that i can't change.

I've just also been thinking about whether or not i should go to Mexico next month. My cousin Roxanne is just about to have her baby so that is a big motivator for me but things over there are completely out of control. You can't go out anywhere without running the risk of the drug cartels getting into it with guns. Yes, there is always a risk that you will end up in the middle of their war and get shot. It's happened many times with innocent people laid out dead. When i say they will pop up anywhere, i mean ANYWHERE. Last i heard, they got into a Circus full of people looking for someone. They will show up in neighborhoods, parks, grocery stores... anywhere it takes. I haven't requested the days off (which would be about 4) but if i go, i'm staying put at Grandma's. I don't want to risk my life but i want to see my family.

What do i do?

prev / next