I would of most likely crumbled and i'm not at all too worried about missing an unload shift; at least not as much as a sales floor one. Earlier today i had one and i honestly didn't think i would make it. I thought i'd end up having to leave early. I dragged. I could barely walk, let alone finish a rail of stuff. I hate feeling like this. I hate not doing my best but you can't do your best when you feel like shit.

My body is warm all over, my throat is sore. I need one day to try and recover, not make things worse. I need one day off where i don't have to worry about getting out of bed.

Saturday, i'm finally getting rid of some stuff in my bedroom. I'm painting it. No more pastel yellow. I'm getting a bigger bed, new sheets, new bed spread. I'm getting rid of my stupid ugly desk and night stand. I'm boxing up all of my old books, journals and notebooks and putting them in the attic. I'm doing all of this because all of the bedrooms are getting new carpet put in and now's as good of a time as any to move shit that i don't want cluttering up my space. They are coming early so my Saturday off will actually be very busy and long.

I don't have the energy to go to work. I'm tired and i cannot handle my department by myself like this for much longer. There's lots of stuff that needs to get done and i just don't have the time to do it all like i would if my supervisor was around to help. Anne had a huddle tonight that took about a half hour which included some scores with our store and what needed improving. We sucked at some stuff but mostly this was to get M-Tosh's bosses off our asses. They told us about not being allowed to have our phones on the floor, then i thought to myself: 'Oh Shit, i hope they don't see the bulge in my pocket'. This is the same stuff repeated over and over. Nothing new. They want us to pull off magic results with a crappy main manager. Yeeeeeah. Not gonna happen.

I'm keeping my phone with me at all times. Don't care. You just can't be a dumb fuck and take it out in plain view for a manager to see.

I just hope that by the end of tomorrow, i'm feeling better. I hate missing work but sick is sick. Oh well.

xoxoxoxo.

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