I had to take my Chevy to the dealer a couple of days ago. Since i don't know shit about cars, nor do i care and since my dad is the expert and pretty much is always there when i need something done, i didn't even try to understand what the recall was about. I just knew i had to get it there to the dealership or they were going to keep giving me notices in the mail. I never had time to before because i always have work and i need my car. I seriously doubted dad would let me touch his baby- His 2009 Black Honda Accord with Beige Leather Interior. That thing just sits there in the garage untouched. Anyway, mom took me to work for 2 days and then i went to go pick up my car and that was that. It's back and i hope nothing else ends up being wrong with it.

Everything is calm on my part. Still haven't talked to TWood and he hasn't even dared tried to contact me. I know he wants to...i can feel it. It's going to take a long time for him to even begin to forget me and i say this because i knew him well and i knew how much he was attached to me. I affected his moods and i determined whether he was okay one day or bummed the next without doing a thing. We were great friends and i knew him long enough where enough things out there would remind him of me. He hurt me though, and i can't forget that. I cried like an idiot when he told me to forget him and pretend like he didn't exist. He was trying to hurt me and he succeeded but he was hurting himself way more than he was hurting me. Sure, i cried but i fucking dried my eyes and kept going and i knew i was going to forget him at some point but i knew he would never forget me. He's a sentimental person, he's a crier and he clings to memories. He doesn't let go easily.

People that hurt others think they're getting away with something by simply pretending that the person they hurt doesn't exist because it's alot easier for them to free themselves from the guilt they feel, cause shit yeah, they're human just like the rest of us...go figure... but eventually pay back comes along. Something i believe strongly in and it doesn't necessarily mean the payback comes from doing something vicious in return. I don't believe in being mean, much less a vicious person but i do believe that those people will eventually get what the deserve. We may not ever get to witness it or even hear about it, but i don't think i'd need to. Moving on with my life is enough for me. The really lucky ones get an apology, a letter, an e-mail, a call. That's the only consolation i have. He knows he lost a great friend. I know i am a great friend, a great person, someone people would like to have as a friend and i don't think i even have to wait for him to know that. He knows. He knew he had a good friend in me and the sad part of this is, that i will never take his friendship back. People like him don't deserve me. He's not the person i blindly saw. I never would have expected to be friend dumped this way. He made it seem like he wanted to get rid of me when all he wanted was to be in my life forever. He chose the most hurtful words you could ever say to a friend. He told me to forget him, move on. He told me not to call, text, e-mail, message. He told me to pretend like he didn't exist and in return i called him a cruel human. I told him i would be just fine and he HE should be the one that should pretend like i didn't exist from here on out but that it would be difficult having how he hurt me in his conscience.

I'm there...wedged inside him. I don't care about receiving any apologies from him in the future. I don't need them. I'm just fine and the only consolation i have is knowing he's not.

xoxoxoxo

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