"Hey! I am sad to hear about what's going on with your grandmother. I'll pray for you when you go to Mexico. I wanted to tell you something else today but time didn't allow me say it. I want to ask you out to BE MY GIRLFRIEND. I KNOW THIS MAY BE UNCOMFORTABLE TO YOU. This is just me speaking as a man and trying to stay honest with you. I've thought about it and it only makes so much sense. I've been thinking about if I ever wanted a girlfriend again and I keep concluding that it would have to be someone like you. I DON'T WANT TO CONFUSE YOU OR PUSH YOU AWAY but I KNOW I HAD TO TELL YOU THIS. All I ask is that you be honest with me because I don't want to ever jeopardize our friendship but I believe it can grow..."

THIS IS WHAT I SAID BACK:

"Anthony:
Oh my God. Seriously. I am in shock. I never expected this from you at all. I know you always admired me and thought the world of me as a person but i didn't think you felt this way. You are one of my best friends, i admire you, i think you are an amazing person and what you just said to me, took courage and i want to say first of all that i really appreciate your honesty and your feelings. Love hasn't exactly been the easiest road for me. In spite of people thinking and telling me that they think i am beautiful or any of that, i've still always felt very limited because in the past i always liked people that were already involved or weren't in love with me. You know my situation, my heart isn't in the right place as far as relationships go. I am not even thinking about anything like that. I want to be completely honest with you when i say that i adore you and that i never want to hurt you in any way. You're like a brother to me...like a true and honest friend that i know i can't find just anywhere and i don't want to ruin our friendship at all. My feelings for you have always been as friends, not as anything more. I know that's probably what you don't want to hear but i want you to know that i don't want this to affect us at all. I know you always said you wanted a girl you dated to be just like me...haha and i don't know why but that flattered me so much when you said it. I just can't believe it. I- don't know what else to say or what i could say to make this less awkward. If i ever dated anyone at any point, i would want to be sure i could grow to be enamored of that person and with you, i just see you as the most amazing friend a woman could ever have. I don't want to or like to lead people on at all because i know what it feels like to be lied to...trust me. I just don't think i could ever love you as a boyfriend. To be honest, my heart is confused about things still and i just want the person i become involved with to love me and i want to love them back too. I want both of us to have those feelings together. I'm sorry if this hurts you. I don't want it to be like that. If you need to take some time, feel free. I won't blame you for not wanting to talk to me if this makes you feel weird at all. I want to thank you for your prayers with regards to my grandmother! i hope she gets better too. Remeber that i still you are a fanstastic friend and i wouldn't trade what we have for anything..."
Love,
K.

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